Exxon energy exec says the US will never be free of our oil habit.

No really. We can't do it.

It's just impossible.

Why do I feel that way? Well...just...ummm...because...

Is there a conflict of interest? Of course not! I would never say these things out of blatant self-interest. I am simply saying that it is impossible!

"Americans depend upon imports to fill the gap," McGill said. "No combination of conservation measures, alternative energy sources and technological advances could realistically and economically provide a way to completely replace those imports in the short or medium term."

Instead of trying to achieve energy independence, importing nations like the U.S. should be promoting energy interdependence, McGill said.

Now the reason I say that no combination of conservation measures, alternative energy sources and technological advances could work is because...well...I'm not gonna let 'em work. Again, no conflict of interest, I just know they won't work. Because I won't let them.

It has NOTHING to do with record profits, it's just not feasible. What? Sweden's doing what?!?!

*pulls George Bush aside* (whisper) Bomb Sweden next, please.

Ahem. Really. There's no way this would work.